Thoughts on Ithaka

For Rebecca.

I hug you harder than either of us is used to
your necklace presses tiny leaf prints into my collar bone
I may be imagining it, but you feel thinner
or maybe sorrow has made you delicate

"ask that your way be long" says the poem
"when you set out for Ithaka
ask that your way be long"

but your father is gone
far sooner than he asked for
as if he sailed away one day
over the edge of a world
made flatter by his departure

something heartfelt and useless
pushes its way out from between my lips
the words drop to the ground
and shatter between our dressy shoes

I have nothing else to say
nothing that might lift the veil from your eyes
but maybe it helps that I see
you

maybe it's a comfort
that I bear witness to this time
when you are set apart by loss

maybe it helps
that I remember you
before you languished in grief

if I can do nothing
say no incantation
if I cannot deliver you
from the grip of Laistrygonians and the Cyclops
and wild Poseidon

if I cannot sail with you
because this journey is not mine

then at least I can hope
for a journey full of adventure, full of instruction
for a way that may be long